Cuddles - Gone, but for how long?

About a year and a half ago, I started feeding "outside kitty". She was very affectionate, had no claws and appears to be neutered since she's never had any kittens. Another cat, whom I called "bad kitty", also showed up to feed on my front steps. "outside kitty" became "Murry" and "bad kitty" became "Cuddles" because she liked to rub against the dogs when I took them for walks at 5 a.m. daily. Cuddles had a litter of 4 kittens on 3/5/2005. We took two, and Bosslers next door took the other two. I decided to get Cuddles neutered so she would not have more kittens. I made an appointment with the Sheboygan County Humane Society to have Cuddles neutered but on the night before we could not catch her and on the day of, she was nowhere to be seen. I had to cancel the appointment.
A few weeks later, it became apparent that Cuddles was pregnant again. I made the decision to take Cuddles to the Humane Society because I didn't want to deal with more kittens and I never wanted Cuddles in the first place.
We started putting her food in a pet taxi so that she would get used to going in there.
Friday, she went in to eat and I closed the door behind her. She did not like it, meowing loudly. I took her to the Humane Society after enduring 4.5 hours of guilt and I cried as I left her. I intend to call them every so often to see how she is and to adopt her back after she has her kittens and is neutered. We'll see how that goes. If somebody else adopts her, that's ok too. I just don't want her to be euthanized if I can help it.
It was tough. I hope she is ok.

Ciao, babies!